Old 11-03-2019, 11:20 AM   #1
jonlint
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Default Barely Alive - Grunge Song

Hi all,

Wrote and recorded this 90's grunge vibe song over a weekend. Feedback most welcome:

https://soundcloud.com/jonathan-linton-3/barely-alive

BARELY ALIVE
(Words by Jonathan Linton, Music by Jonathan Linton)

Iím a machine
Help everyone
Iíve always been
The unfortunate son
So leave me behind
With my despair
I have resigned
To go nowhere

Body is strong
But the mind is gone
Hope deprived
Iím barely alive
Each time
I find
A lifeline
Itís deprived
Yeah, Iím barely alive

Iíve been accused
Iíve been abused
They even hide
When theyíre amused
Preyed upon
Future foregone
Ambition gone
But doom to live on

Body is strong
But the mind is gone
Hope deprived
Iím barely alive
Each time
I find
A lifeline
Itís deprived
Yeah, Iím barely alive

SOLO

Body is strong
But the mind is gone
Hope deprived
Iím barely alive
Each time
I find
A lifeline
Itís deprived
Yeah, Iím barely alive
Iím barely alive
Iím barely alive
Barely alive
Barely alive
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Old 11-03-2019, 04:56 PM   #2
prom
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Enjoyed this but I felt solo section, which was nice enough btw, could have stolen the show by somehow increasing the awesome and playing out the track,returning to verse seems a compromise here.I got the impression you could pull that off.
Works as it is though and recording sounds great in my cans.
Just food for thought.
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Old 11-09-2019, 04:17 AM   #3
jonlint
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Quote:
Originally Posted by prom View Post
Enjoyed this but I felt solo section, which was nice enough btw, could have stolen the show by somehow increasing the awesome and playing out the track,returning to verse seems a compromise here.I got the impression you could pull that off.
Works as it is though and recording sounds great in my cans.
Just food for thought.
Hey there,

Thanks for the compliments and feedback. Actually my solo playing ability is not that great but I thought at the time that a more slower solo would fit. On reflection, I think you are right - a "wilder" solo would fit well, especially as the song has a slow tempo.

In the meantime, I made a remix because some of the mix balance was off to me and also based on some critique. Here it is:

https://soundcloud.com/jonathan-lint...arely-alive-v2
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Old 11-09-2019, 02:07 PM   #4
prom
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Vital Signs Monitor - new addition? Good idea to throw that in there,I don't remember hearing that before.
Intro - smacked with a wall of sound (no warning) works,but struck me that pehaps very short sustaining reversed/backwards chordal feedback might be fun to play with? I would also explore stretching instrumental space between first two vocal sections (again it just felt to me that there are unexplored areas hiding possibilities).
Doing anything more to what is already in existence? there has to be a good reason for you to bother so, yeah.
All sounds fine to me really,continue to enjoy composing/recording Jonathan!
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Old 11-10-2019, 09:44 PM   #5
metallicaguy1
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I am NOOOO expert, but I heard too much high end. I know the bass was there, but everything else--to me--sounded too bright, I guess you can say. Too much treble. Maybe if you eq'd everything to be a little on the lower side. It's your song though. Other than that, it sounds great. Almost took me on a time machine to the 90s lol. Back when music was actually good.
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Old 11-10-2019, 10:43 PM   #6
BCF1
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I listened on my phone so i can't comment on mix but i like the song. If your game I'd like to have a go at a "wilder" lead guitar part.
Hit me up Jon

Great job
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