ometimes you're payin
sometimes you're playin
sometimes yu draw to a pair
sometimes you're shirkin
sometimes you're workin
sometimes you're not even there
and sometimes it's awful hard to care
sometimes you're lyin
sometimes you're spyin
sometimes you just do not dare
sometimes you're tryin
sometimes you're dyin
sometimes there's nothing to spare
and sometimes it's awful hard to care
.
ometimes you eat the bear
sometimes the bear eats you
sometimes you whine sometimes you cry
sometimes that's all you do
.
sometimes you're buyin
sometimes you're flyin
sometimes you hang in midair
sometimes you're winnin
sometimes lyou're losin
and sometimes it just isnt fair
and sometimes it's awful hard to care
sometimes it's awful damn hard to care
.
a couple things, here... this is an old song, but I couldn't remember the words except "sometimes it's awful hard to care"... seems like the old words were better...
if anyone has any ideas for improving the words, please post them so I can plug them in before I record this
I've got music, but if yu want to make your own music, do it
You might want to try Kompoz for this as it really is a more suitable platform.
My suggestion though .. too much of Sometimes..
example of first verse:
Sometimes you're payin, you're playin or draw to a pair
Sometimes you're shirkin, you're workin or not even there
Yes, sometimes it's awful (and so) hard to care
I had a swing/shuffle rhythm in mind when I wrote it... the words seem to fit okay into a shuffle..
don't know about the repetition... i'll think about it, may have to junk the song, but i'll record it in that shuffle beat and you can see if it fits okay, and see if the repetition is too much to deal with
about posting at kompoz... I don't think you know what my intentions are so you don't really know what's suitable for me ... but thanks for the suggestion
as far as I can tell, somebody in my position cant do much... about all you can do is make a more-or-less token effort to make the song accessible... they've got a chance at soudcloud... if they're good enough, they'll survive...
if they're not good enough to survive... well... too bad
maybe I'm a musical darwinist
Last edited by flickervetigo; 03-21-2015 at 11:24 AM.
this "exposure" business is kinda tricky, but I got kind of a bad attitude... my job, the way it feels, is to write the damn songs and make them accessible
you think, "well, for crying out loud, this thred has got a thousand views, so the song must be getting out"
but it isn't... if you divide the number of views by the number of posts, you find out that only ten or twelve people are paying any attention, maybe not even that many... and the ratio of soundcloud listens to thread views is even worse
.
the only hope anyone's got is to to write a killer song, one that's good enough to get people's attention and take on a life of its own... then, if lyou've made your songs accessible, people can go back through it and see if there's anything else that's salvageable
that's my theory, anyhow, so that's how I'm operating
.
Last edited by flickervetigo; 03-21-2015 at 11:18 AM.
you can get so bogged down in promoting yourself that you forget to focus on the songs and then you start cranking out trash... well, why not?
the big promotion machinery is so powerful --and there's so much talent working for it-- they can turn trash into gold... so what's the point of trying to write decent songs?
who knows? ...who cares?
Last edited by flickervetigo; 03-21-2015 at 11:33 PM.
I thought the lyrics were crap. It's "sometimes" followed by a rhyme. If the tune is a killer tune then it won't matter of course, and they might work great. But they don't read all that well.
any suggestions for word changes before I record this?
sometimes you're workin
sometimes you're lurkin
sometimes you're not even there
sometimes yyou're certain
sometimes you're hurtin
sometimes you're in for repair
and sometimes it's awful hard to care
sometimes you're buyin
sometimes you're flyin
sometimes you hang in midair
sometimes you're lyin
sometimes denyin
sometimes you dont have a prayer
and sometines it's awful hard to care
sometimes you eat the bear
sometimes the bear eats you
sometimes you whine
sometimes you cry
sometimes that's all you do
sometimes that's all you do
sometimes you're payin
sometimes you're playin
sometimes you raise on a pair
sometimes it's mayhem
sometimes a haven
sometimes i wish you were there
and sometimes it's awful hard to care
sometimes it's awful damn hard to care
.
Last edited by flickervetigo; 11-19-2015 at 07:28 AM.
...the only hope anyone's got is to to write a killer song, one that's good enough to get people's attention and take on a life of its own... then, if lyou've made your songs accessible, people can go back through it and see if there's anything else that's salvageable
that's my theory, anyhow, so that's how I'm operating
.
Well they say even a bad plan is better than no plan... not thats its a bad plan so it must be good...
Who knows, maybe much of that over-clichéd pop stuff will disappear and make some extra room when absolutely everyone knows how to do it but couldn't be bothered, there should be a codified stamp on over-clichéd records imo ie-CRAP [Clichéd Record Autotune Production] or something
I'm reminded of a lecture I once heard about song writing. The dude giving the lecture said that people can only process one thing at a time. So in the part of a song where you are trying to get a story across in the lyrics, keep the melody simple and constant. If you are writing a section where melody and arrangement are important and complicated, don't try to tell a story, because the listener can't attend to both. So maybe this means that you are going to work the melody and arrangement hard in this song. Or maybe the guy was full of it.
My guess is that the lyrics could work if the if the focus is on a clever melody, phrasing, rhythm,chord structure, etc. Maybe the repetition will free you up to do things you wouldn't ordinarily do musically. I say try it and then decide.
the original song seemed to work okay... it was written in '77 or '78... but I cant remember the original words, which seemed, in memory, to be more ambiguous, more mysterious
I did remember the hook and the tune, though, which seems to mean there's "something there"...
...which is what a girlfriend used to say when she was looking at a horse she didn't like... "there's nothing there", she'd say
.
once I post the song, maybe you could tell me what you think again
.
Last edited by flickervetigo; 11-19-2015 at 08:02 AM.
awful hard to care
Linear Mode
